To snook or not to snook – wot so funee?

I went through the notes in my phone the other day and found some funees that I haven’t written up. So these are from the past couple of months, but I can still remember them now that the notes jog my memory.

When we were still living at Granny and Grandad’s house, Andrew saw a bit of a game of polo on the TV when they had it on in the background. He looked at it and came out with quite an accurate name for it: “That’s horse golf!” So now I will always think of polo as horse golf, because, well, it is really!

I have to say that both boys do like what some might think of as ‘healthy’ breakfast cereals – give them a bowl of weetabix or shreddies any day over a sugary sweet cereal. Andrew has got particularly into bran flakes recently, since we moved into our new house and Daddy ordered a couple of big boxes on our internet supermarket shop for when we first arrived. Only he likes to call them “brown flakes”, because that’s what he though he heard us say the first time he asked what they were. And indeed they are brown, and they are flakes, so again another accurate description from our little observant one!

Andrew has recently noticed that ‘Andrex’ is only one letter different from his name. The reason why we have talked about Andrex is that he is quite prone to doing an Andrex with the toilet roll when he’s taking some off the roll after going to the toilet. Joel has also been known to Andrex the roll, just for fun – what toddler hasn’t tried that?! So Daddy decided to show him a youtube clip of the old 1990s Andrex advert – the one where the boy is sitting on the loo and the lab runs off with the end of the roll, which he thinks is funny until there is none left for him to use. Andrew thought it was very funny watching the dog run off with the toilet paper, but his question at the end was: “What’s the boy doing on the toilet?” Erm, what do you think Andrew?! Give the lad some privacy. No wait, this was aired to millions of people when it was on TV, and now even more people via youtube.

Over the summer we went to a couple of the ‘drop-ins’ that our church had organised to help entertain families in the long summer holidays when there are no groups on. As well as toddler toys, there were also some bigger kids toys like table tennis tables, football tables and a snooker table. Andrew was far more interest din these various tables than he was in the usual cars and blocks that he annoys playing with at toddler groups. At one point he was trying to get me to come over to him at the snooker table, but I was busy trying to entertain Joel in another way (he’d already nearly caused a lot of damage by throwing a snooker ball across the room – oops!) Andrew’s words to try and get me over there were: “Mummy, please come over, we need to snook!” Of course, what does one do at a snooker table? One snooks, it’s obvious.

One night around bedtime I was trying to let Joel have some milk time, but Andrew had joined us and was jumping on the bed, so totally distracting Joel. I could hear Daddy coming up the stairs, so when he got to the top, I shouted over to him: “Can you remove Andrew from our presence please Daddy?” Andrew’s response was priceless: “Where? What presents?!” with a disturbed look on his face!

But Andrew isn’t the only one who causes trouble when we’re trying to do something else. One day when I was trying to make lunch for us, Joel managed to grab some biscuits off the work surface and was starting to munch them without me noticing. Andrew was on the ball though and shouted loudly: “Joel’s causing hammock!!” I had to think twice about what he meant, but when I saw the start of what could have been far more mess had we not stopped it, I understood why it was “hammock” (or havoc).


Wot So Funee?

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